This is a tough topic to write about, even worse the think about because you always fall down the rabbit hole of wondering how different life could or would have been if you made a different choice or acted in a different way. There are a lot of things that could have changed if things had worked out differently. We all have regrets, unfortunately sometimes it is just a part of life. We all have regrets, simple as. Maybe you wish that you said that little phrase to that certain someone or that you took that risk that would have changed it all. Sometimes, I wish that I did too. Maybe I always will; but if life has taught me anything it is that you cannot change the past and you certainly cannot live in it either.
Sometimes, the world is too harsh and cruel. The way that you live is far from the one you imagined, and maybe the one you always hoped for. Sometimes, the world is good, and everything falls into place perfectly. Maybe the way you are living is everything that you ever needed. Sometimes, the way that everything played out was far from what you expected yet still worked out in the best way possible. One thing that my mother always told me is that everything happens for a reason, and one thing that I have learned is that everything works out; even if it does not always feel like it is going to.
Living in the past, it is a weird concept and it certainly does not mean the same for everybody. Maybe it means that you wish the person you are now was the person you were then or maybe you are just replaying all those memories you wished were different or maybe you just wish life had played out differently. Living in the past can mean a lot or nothing at all. I know that maybe it is a patronising thought, blaming yourself and wishing that things were a lot more different to what they are now. It hurts. There is no two way around it, living in the past hurts regardless of whether it is something you think of often.
Now and then, wanting to live in the past is because of someone; the way that they made you feel and the memories that you sometimes think you are better off without. Memories tend to be made up of the people we make them with, there are too many with people not here anymore and so many more to be made with people that will change your life for the better. Sometimes, you miss it all. The people who made those moments worth holding onto and the people you secretly wished were still here. When someone comes into your life, I have been told too many times, it is for a reason, a season or for life.
Life moves fast, maybe too fast for some of us. If 2020 taught us anything it is how quickly things can change. I know this year has been bad and good and not always in equal measures; I tried running to something I thought I wanted but life had moved on. I had moved on. Moving away and changing my lifestyle completely, even before Covid would have been drastic but this was extreme on another level. It was scary, running and jumping blindly did not work out in the way I thought it would. Blindly jumping into something new can be the best idea and work out brilliantly and then sometimes it does not. It is about taking risks sometimes.
However this did teach me some things; life is not going to stand still and wait for you, so if there is an opportunity for something you want and even if this is something you only want a little bit then go for it. Taking risks can sometimes be the best decision you ever make, sometimes that decision can be wrong and sometimes it is good to try. I will hold my hands up and admit that I am impulsive but that has led to some of the better opportunities of my life and I certainly would not be writing this if I had not taken risks. There is something someone said to me a long time ago; give it a shot because at least you can say you tried and at some point, it was something that you wanted once.
The point of these articles are to help and give advice that maybe we all wish we had at some point in our pasts and here is something that I think is very important; your past may be a big part of you, playing a large role in the way you think and act; but it really does not define you. Those mistakes and those choices they are in the past so learn from them, grow and move forward. Life is too short and moves to fast to not take risks and it is not worth living in the past; there are no re-dos.